The Art Of Flirting:

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5 Surprising Secrets To Conscious Flirting.

Do you remember the feeling of your heart racing as a random stranger gives you a gorgeous smile and says something playful to you?

Or perhaps you are feeling particularly juicy and find yourself smiling and engaging in a fun banter with your local grocer?

Or maybe you have notice how your friend always seems to charm everyone while you feel a little unnoticed?

Flirting is more than just a smile and some quirky lines, flirting is how we celebrate the beauty of being alive.

Flirting is Natural & Necessary

Flirting is for all ages and is actually the lubricant of delight in our world.

I’m not speaking about the type of flirting that is locked into a goal of ‘getting something’ or just purely ‘sexual’ in its intent.

The true expression of flirting is a genuine desire to share in the beauty of life and ignite another person, even for a brief moment.

Flirting of this kind is never inappropriate and nor is it something we need to read a book on, it is something all of us naturally know.

It is our ability to see beauty in others along with the desire to see this beauty shine even brighter.

5 insights to Artful Flirting

1. Beauty Within and Without

Artful flirting is not possible if we do not acknowledge beauty, within ourselves and others.

This means we must seek to experience and express our own innate beauty regularly.

It also means defining for yourself what beauty is and allowing beauty to touch you profoundly, actually opening you up to the deep experience of aliveness within you.

2. Authentic Warmth

Another secret to successful flirting is to spend time opening your heart.

Discover what burdens your heart and do your best to transform that and make new choices.

You will find yourself falling in love with yourself which naturally translates into having a warm, authentic presence.

3. Marrying Our Heart and Erotic Nature

This inner marriage is yet another fundamental must in artful flirting and succulent living.

This is when your emotional nature is allowed to blossom, mature, and to become a lover with your erotic nature.

It is also when your own sexuality is honored for her wisdom, innocence and intelligence.

Your erotic nature yearns to be met by the radiant respect of your heart.

This union within you gives you access to delicious, new, subtle (but not so subtle) experiences of your pleasure as your birthright.

It also creates a gourmet relationship with yourself which allows you to go out into the world from an abundant place of true desire and creativity.

4. Igniting Delight Within

Igniting delight within yourself is the fourth insight to living a succulent and artfully flirtatious life.

Looking at your current definition of delight and possibly refining and expanding upon it can do wonders for opening up to new levels of delight.

Delight is a result of an open heart and alive sensuality. It is your capacity to perceive and sense beauty and pleasure in the world and to translate it internally as deliciousness.

5. Letting go of Goals

Flirting is often connected with sex being the end result.

But flirting with a specific goal can also lead to disappointment, or worse, manipulating others so we can have our needs satisfied.

Therefore, being able to let go of the need to ‘make someone’ react a certain way to our ‘flirtatious’ offering allows us to come from a place of generosity versus a place of lack.

This shift allows us to flirt as a way of sharing our aliveness with integrity and sensitivity.

It becomes something amazingly invigorating and fulfilling, in of itself!

The Dark Side of Flirting

Saying all of that, it is important to pay homage to the dark-side of flirting.

We live in a world that has a skewed view on sensuality and sexuality and for some, flirting can only be seen as manipulative or debasing.

Of course, they have missed the point (and the joy!).

But it is also wise to understand that not everyone will respond to flirting with delight.

Once we know this and once we are truly aligned to the Art of Flirting itself, we can then pick and choose our moments so that we only bring more positive connection into the world.

So the next time you are at a check-out counter and the clerk asks if you need anything else, you might answer, “Yes” and pause for a moment to see if they are listening. With eye contact say, “A smile would make my day.” 9 times out of 10, they will break into a brilliant smile.

If living more artfully with your playful sensuality is something that turns you on, you may delight in exploring my Art of Succulent Living philosophy. Click here to enjoy my book.

How To Take Advantage Of Your Man’s Wandering Eyes

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You are out with your man and a gorgeous woman walks by, he almost breaks his neck from following her with his eyes.

You find your man flipping through picture after picture of beautiful women on the internet while he barely notices your presence.

On the beach, you are walking hand in hand with your lover when you notice his eyes lingering on a beautiful woman’s shapely tanned body.

Before you start to get angry or feel betrayed and hurt, you may want to step back for a moment and take a better look at your man.

As frustrating as his ‘wandering eyes’ can be, there is a gift to them!

The key is to understand this natural masculine response to beauty and to take full advantage of it.

Why do his eyes wander?

Before accusing him of being unfaithful or just a plain outright pervert, you may want to peek into the motivator behind the action.

Testosterone.

We love this guy, don’t we?

In fact, testosterone is responsible for that feeling of desire and is the instigator behind our libido.

Without testosterone, there would be no sexual play, no attraction, just cuddles and snuggles, but not hot, burning lust.

Testosterone also is behind the sexy, strong muscles we love so much.

What about confidence?

Testosterone again! Self-confidence and assertiveness are enhanced with its presence.

And don’t we just love a confident man who knows what he wants?

Absolutely.

Yet the very same hormone is initiates sexual thoughts and fantasies and increases our desire for one-night stands and affairs, as it is quite fond of novelty.

Which is where the ‘other woman’ comes in.

The unknown beauty ramps up your mans testosterone levels and before you know it, his eyes are eating her alive.

The same happens within us, albeit at levels a little less intense then an man’s.

Now, testosterone has a buddy.

LHRH. In fact, it is LHRH that kick starts our man’s testosterone when a gorgeous woman shows up.

It also regulates testosterone levels in his body making sure that he is always ‘ready and willing’ when a woman is available.

Now here’s the catch:

Stress and the threat of danger can short-circuit this cyclical two-part harmony and shut down your man. The same is true for you.

Here’s the deal.

When a man’s has been in a relationship for a long time, there is often a loss of novelty, of excitement, and therefore, the loss of testosterone. 

To make matters worse, the stress of life and feelings of being dominated or belittled dwindle a man’s testosterone levels.

In fact, one of the worst culprits of male castration has been the Feminist movement. Men no longer know how to be good men AND maintain their testosterone levels.

Have you castrated you man? Do you hang him ‘out by the balls’?

Men are remarkably sensitive creatures.

Testosterone, as potent and delicious as it can be, is also phenomenally delicate and easily disrupted by external causes.

As a man ages and perhaps gains a little weight, his testosterone levels go down. When he loses, at work or socially, his levels plummet.

The lower they are, the less drive he will have, both inside and outside of the bedroom

But there’s help.

By encouraging your man’s testosterone and LHRH levels.

How?

Before kicking his butt down to the local gym and getting him to pump iron, you may want to consider how powerful your influence actually is.

Rev his motor and ride his turn on!

Once you understand that you can play a part in creating a sexy, confident, and turned on man, you may find great joy in creating new ways to titillate your man.

Here are a few suggestions:

1. Point out hot women to him and let him know that his turn on is your turn on.

2. Send him texts or emails with images of gorgeous women (that you find beautiful too).

3. Write him an explicit fantasy of your own. Get wild in your story-telling and leave it on his desk-top for him to find.

4. If you are game, turn yourself on and record your own sounds of pleasure. Talk to him and let him know what you are doing. Send him the recording or leave it on his voice mail.

Men are both highly visual and auditory.

The more you surprise him this way, the more excited and delighted he will be. And the healthier his levels of testosterone will be.

Through gifting our man the freedom to respond to beauty, he will find a new sense of novelty within his relationship, finding us all the more attractive and desirable.

If it feels juicy to gain confidence and insight to delight in beauty and share its inspiration with your partner, click here to get started with my book: The Emergence of the Sensual Woman.

Yoni-Pulse: Do you have one?

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7 Insights to Awaken Your Arousal Cues.

Have you felt your own yoni-pulse lately? The deep, persistent throbbing within you that reminds you life is not only about to-do lists and end results?

May be you have never felt your own molten heat filling your core and wonder what all the fuss is about?

Or worse, you used to feel this primal resonance, yet now it is elusive and random at best.

Whatever the case, most of us are actually conditioned out of noticing our own arousal cues from a very young age… it is literally socialized out of us!

Finding Your Yoni-Pulse

Within every woman lives a deep secret, a secret that is measurable by modern instruments, yet its true purpose is hardly understood.

This secret is not of your mind.

Or even your heart. Although both are involved in it.

It is of your Yoni. Your genitals.

More specifically, it is related to the health and expression of your pelvic nerve.

There has been a correlation between strong yoni-pulses, a literal pulsing or throbbing inside our yoni, and stronger, consistent communication with our brain via our pelvic nerve.

Erotically, this means we have greater ease in accessing our deep pleasure.

Yet if all women are born with this pulse, so why do most  women suffer from its disappearing act?

“Don’t touch yourself like that, it’s dirty! Bad girl!”

How can something that feels so good, be so wrong? Is our wiring all mixed up?

No.

It is the adults who are all mixed up and unfortunately, this trend of ‘socializing young girls to be proper’ is literally turning down or completing shutting down this primal and essential communication between our yoni and our brain.

Mixed messages of feeling something is delicious and being told that it is bad is very damaging to our delicate and intrinsic nature.

Our yoni’s were not just designed to be a birthing canal and place for sexual interaction, they were also perfectly designed to give us accurate ‘readings’ of the world around us.

Women who have not lost this connection or those who reconnect with it say the same: they constantly get clear messages from their yoni’s on a daily basis.

They know when something is delicious and enlivening because their yoni pulses with more certainty and vigor.

They equally know when something is off as their yoni’s pulse becomes almost still and indistinguishable.

So what are we doing when we program little girls away from listening to their own deep inner guidance?

We are creating a world where women feel lost, disconnected, lifeless, numb, and unsure of themselves.

I want to feel my yoni-pulse please!

If we have lost touch with our deep instinctual wisdom, how can we reclaim it and reap the benefits of rekindling a profound trust in our own self?

1. Being Honest: The first step is to acknowledge that you are not fully attuned to your yoni-pulse.

2. Pay Attention & Notice: Make a choice to pay attention to your yoni in different situations. Sometimes you may notice her pulsing at the oddest moments. Do not discount her! Simply acknowledge to yourself that you are indeed ‘turned on’ and breathe into it.

3. Let Go Of stories: Don’t worry about justifying your turn-on, instead focus on actually feeling your turn-on and perhaps even amplifying it.

4. Allow Yourself To BE: Know that you don’t actually have to do anything about your turn-on, sometimes the greatest gift is just to be turned on.

5. Explore Slowly: Spend time exploring your yoni in an un-rushed, non-goal oriented way. In fact, the more you can relax and enjoy yourself, even to the point of just simply holding your yoni or a point inside of her, you will start to feel an exquisite pulse and even perhaps, a delicious tingle that will rise up your finger into your hand and arm.

6, Relax Profoundly: I cannot stress enough the importance of your ability to melt, soften, and relax completely. If you are not sure how to do this, start simply with the idea of melting open your pelvic floor. Once you think you have it, melt even more.

7. Positive Affirmation: Affirm your turn-on and its wisdom as often as you can. The more you do, the more you will feel and the more you will learn to trust this deep compass within you.

By awakening our yoni-pulse and reclaiming its exquisite pleasure and wisdom, we activate the center in our brain responsible for our self-esteem and courage and enter a world of transcendent beauty and creativity.

If it feels delicious to explore the genius within your pelvis, you may want to explore the Jade Egg practice, revealed in my book.