Yoni eggs are on the rise in popularity, so much so that they’ve made late night TV. Yet along with this amazing evidence that more and more women desire to claim their pleasure and sexual vitality comes the sad fact that this profound practice is being diluted into “drive-thru Jade Egg practice” aka the McEgg […]
What is your relationship with pleasure as a daily practice?
Do you hold your pleasure in a great state of reverence?
Or is it something you are still sometimes feeling guilty or shame about?
Hedonism tends to have a bad rap, but it’s roots are quite astonishing!
In this new delicious tip video, I explore what Conscious Hedonism really is, where it comes from and what the true meaning behind enjoying pleasure.
Your opinion matters to me. Be sure to leave me your thoughts below so we can continue to explore the true meaning of hedonism in our lives.
In reverence to your pleasure,
Many moons ago, when I first caught sight of Taoist sexual practice books, there was one very compelling argument that intrigued me more than the idea of having unlimited orgasms:
Eternal Youth.
I remember the feeling in my body as I read the words that said I had the power to stop my body from aging as soon as I would master a particular ancient practice.
I was electrified at the idea of being special and
unique in my capacities to naturally stop the aging process.
Proof that it worked meant that my menses would end, in other words, I’d achieve early menopause at the young age of 23!
I remember the excitement coursing through my body at the idea of ending my menses early and maintaining my youthful vitality and beauty. I did not once question this fantastical idea and wholeheartedly jumped into a dedicated practice.
And dedicated it was. I did a minimum of 3 hours per day of practice every day without ever missing one (even if I had a hot date, was seeing family, or traveling!). This went on for 3 full years.
After that, my practice ranged from 1hour-4hours/day for another 9 years.
I finally came to my senses after 12 years of dedicated practice, but I’m getting ahead of myself.
After just a few years, I actually managed to completely stop my cycle. All that came out on the day I was suppose to bleed as a small, marble like, soft ball of white mucus. I was able to maintain this for several months. until I came into contact with a fertile woman, and then my cycle started again.
Initially, I was very excited at my accomplishment and highly disappointed when it didn’t last. Upon further practice and investigation, I’ve come to realize that this feat is not attainable if one is both hormonally healthy and a socially connected female (being exposed to the pheromones of fertile women triggers the fertility cycle in your own body which is why practicing Taoist nuns avoid going into the villages, etc).
I realized that I was only able to attain such feats when I withdrew from the world and basically lived as a nun – in deep practice and avoiding contact with people.
After almost 2 decades of practice, here’s what I now realize:
These promises, although lofty, speak (and sell) easily to the parts of us that would love to remain young forever.
They are so alluring that we rarely stop to question the actual process that we are willing to succumb our body to.
Since beginning my longevity journey, I’ve learned to love being a woman, being cyclical by nature and having a feminine brain that naturally gifts me different ways to perceive my reality.
I’ve discovered that eternal youthfulness is the gift of having an unburdened, open heart along with a healthy, playful relationship with one’s own animal body.
Don’t get me wrong, the practices, often known as the ‘Deer Exercises” are useful. They create relationship with one’s body, support healthy blood and lymph flow, and if done correctly, stimulate hormones that support vitality and youthfulness.
But they don’t keep you forever at the age of 23.
In fact, if these practices are done incorrectly or out of context, they can sometimes create imbalances in our sensitive body. Never mind the negative impact of enhancing and anchoring immature narcissistic fantasies.
We’d be better off to see the practices for what they really do offer and to embrace our beautiful human foibles with love and a sprinkle of humor.
In seeking to understand longevity, I also looked into centenarians and discovered that there exists a full spectrum of ideals—from those who eat pure food, drink pure water, breathe pure air, do gentle movements and live a benevolent, happy life to those who eat crap, drink crap, and smoke like a chimney and who are miserable and cranky.
They all live to be over a hundred.
After almost 2 decades of practice I’ve learned that it isn’t the technique that matters, but the shift in our consciousness that makes all the difference.
Personally, I sense that living in harmony with our own nature and with that of the greater Nature around us is the key to the fountain of youth. By drinking daily of the elixir of pleasure and happiness without condition or reason we rejuvenate not only our body, but our essence.
Through delighting in our moments, as they are, we are actually more alive, free to shamelessly live out our true nature.
No amount of “special” practice can give us that.
If falling in love with your own inner wisdom and harnessing your natural aliveness is inspiring, you may want to start with my book: Emergence of the Sensual Woman.
As always, I would love to hear directly from you. What did you find challenging about this article? Was there anything that inspired you? What are your choices based on? Let me know in the comment section below.
You notice a chain reaction in the room as a woman walks by—she isn’t the most beautiful or best dressed woman in the room, but something about her is spell-binding.
Inside your body you sense a warmth washing through you, as though you are made of warm, honey-nectar… irresistible.
Within you is a dance, the way your eyes move, the way your lips form their words, the way in which your fingertips touch whatever the come into contact with. You are turned-on by yourself and in turn, turn-on the world around you.
This isn’t manipulation, it’s natural and… hormonal.
Within you lives your own feline nature, the part of you that undulates slowly to the heart beat of life itself.
It’s related to a state of being known as: PROCEPTIVE.
Pro-actively receptive.
It happens when oxytocin & estrogen dance together and unleash allure, seduction, and the ‘come hither and claim me’ version of ourselves.
What’s even more interesting is when we choose to both turn off our ability to sense when this happening within us and to ignore the strong hormonal signals that we are transmitting out into the world.
Why would we do that?
Because we are afraid. Afraid of sending off the “wrong signals”.
What are the “wrong signals”? Who defined what is a right or wrong signal?
Whatever the answer may be, I’m more interested in how we personally relate to these ideas.
Having taught conscious flirting for years, I’ve come across the feminine paradox:
Desiring to be more desirable while being
simultaneously repulsed or afraid of it.
I want to venture to say that our idea of seduction has always been a double-edged sword, so it comes to no surprise that we would both desire to be more powerfully seductive and simultaneously shun our alluring capacities.
These ideas are not new. In fact, the word persuasion comes from the Greek goddess Peitho, also known as the Goddess of Persuasion especially in relation to romance, seduction and love.
In her story, she is both capable of alluring and inspiring people to do as she desires while also being able to elicit violent reactions towards herself.
I sense this Greek goddess was born of the natural capacity that we have as women to be proceptive and the consequences of having this power.
We cannot help this natural magnetic quality from existing, yet our lack of understanding in this potent power is what actually can lead to trouble.
So how do we make peace with this obvious paradox?
First off, accepting and celebrating that our body naturally creates a state in which we receive the world in a pro-active fashion. This means that we intentionally allow what delights us to manifest and when it does, we allow it to touch us deeply.
Then comes responsibility.
Although our instinctual or animal self has this natural capacity, we live in a domesticated world.
A world where beauty is exploited and abused.
A world that has forgotten to protect the feminine and generations of women who have forgotten how to receive and inspire protection.
Responsibility therefore comes in the shape of recognizing our innate power, of harnessing this power and using it wisely to bring more of what we love into our lives, and of simultaneously being aware that our very ambivalence to our seductive nature can and does create the experience of what we don’t want to attract into our lives.
This begs us to look at our ambivalence. To see where we have deep desire to be more attractive and to get what we love in our life… and to see where we are terrified of going for what we truly would love and then allowing ourselves to really receive it fully.
We have natural power and with that power we must have wisdom.
We are meant to inspire action in the world, the kind of action we inspire is up to us individually.
Denying we are seductive places us in a precarious position, one where we still innately are magnetic, but one where we may suffer the consequences of the influence this primal force has on others.
Let’s look at it alchemically.
Inside of us is our magnetic womb-space, the birth-center of creation itself and the home of our sensual/sexual power.
This center is like water, it flows with sensuality and aliveness.
Inside of us there is also our heart-space, the center of our passion, enthusiasm, and profound self-respect.
This center is more like fire, it burns with exceptional brightness and has the capacity to burn through illusion and have us see the truth.
When we combine our water and fire elements, our sexuality with the consciousness of our heart center, in other words, our eros with our psyche, we birth steam, we birth pleasure, we birth conscious proceptivity.
In fact, what is intriguing about conscious sexual practice is invoking sexual hormones in combination with oxytocin. In other words, we create proceptivity on an on-going basis.
Women who do this literally glow like sweet, golden honey.
Our capacity to harness our natural seduction in combination with deep consciousness allows us to make peace with this powerful feminine force and to create experiences in the world that are both deliciously rewarding while being healthy and life-giving.
If learning how to do this for yourself is intriguing, I’d recommend starting with my book, The Emergence of The Sensual Woman.
I want to hear from you, is it true for you what I’ve shared? Do you desire to be more attractive and yet fear it? Do you love to flirt, yet dislike having to deal with the responses to your beauty? What other challenges do you face in being a magnetic being?
Hello Gorgeous!
Did you know that your perception of others, your judgments of others, is actually a reflection of how you see yourself?
This months delicious tip explores how to transform our self-loathing and envy of others into more self-delight and self-love.
I know this can be a sensitive subject, yet there is nothing more liberating than transforming the heaviness of self-criticism into the invigorating inspiration of self-recognition.
And the best part? I use a playful game to do this… no seriousness here!
If this video inspired you, please share it and leave me your insights in the comments section.
In the spirit of deep self-love,
Hello Pleasurista!
Did you know that sitting is actually ruining your pleasure potential?
In this month’s delicious tip, we explore the determential impact of being part of a ‘sitting culture’ and how we can transform our pelvis with a ridiculously simple breathing technique.
I’m not sure about you, but I haven’t yet reached my limit for pleasure… and I love the idea that it could be an unlimited experience!
Are you ready to ignite more of your pleasure potential?
If you got something delightful out of this video, let your friends enjoy it too and share a comment on what happened as you explored this simple breathing technique.
Deep, sensual breathing,
ps. This month is my b’day and I’d love to know how these monthly tips are working for you as well what the most profound insight you have received from me on our Succulent Journey together.