You notice a chain reaction in the room as a woman walks by—she isn’t the most beautiful or best dressed woman in the room, but something about her is spell-binding.
Inside your body you sense a warmth washing through you, as though you are made of warm, honey-nectar… irresistible.
Within you is a dance, the way your eyes move, the way your lips form their words, the way in which your fingertips touch whatever the come into contact with. You are turned-on by yourself and in turn, turn-on the world around you.
This isn’t manipulation, it’s natural and… hormonal.
Within you lives your own feline nature, the part of you that undulates slowly to the heart beat of life itself.
It’s related to a state of being known as: PROCEPTIVE.
It happens when oxytocin & estrogen dance together and unleash allure, seduction, and the ‘come hither and claim me’ version of ourselves.
What’s even more interesting is when we choose to both turn off our ability to sense when this happening within us and to ignore the strong hormonal signals that we are transmitting out into the world.
Why would we do that?
Because we are afraid. Afraid of sending off the “wrong signals”.
What are the “wrong signals”? Who defined what is a right or wrong signal?
Whatever the answer may be, I’m more interested in how we personally relate to these ideas.
Having taught conscious flirting for years, I’ve come across the feminine paradox:
Desiring to be more desirable while being
simultaneously repulsed or afraid of it.
I want to venture to say that our idea of seduction has always been a double-edged sword, so it comes to no surprise that we would both desire to be more powerfully seductive and simultaneously shun our alluring capacities.
These ideas are not new. In fact, the word persuasion comes from the Greek goddess Peitho, also known as the Goddess of Persuasion especially in relation to romance, seduction and love.
In her story, she is both capable of alluring and inspiring people to do as she desires while also being able to elicit violent reactions towards herself.
I sense this Greek goddess was born of the natural capacity that we have as women to be proceptive and the consequences of having this power.
We cannot help this natural magnetic quality from existing, yet our lack of understanding in this potent power is what actually can lead to trouble.
So how do we make peace with this obvious paradox?
First off, accepting and celebrating that our body naturally creates a state in which we receive the world in a pro-active fashion. This means that we intentionally allow what delights us to manifest and when it does, we allow it to touch us deeply.
Then comes responsibility.
Although our instinctual or animal self has this natural capacity, we live in a domesticated world.
A world where beauty is exploited and abused.
A world that has forgotten to protect the feminine and generations of women who have forgotten how to receive and inspire protection.
Responsibility therefore comes in the shape of recognizing our innate power, of harnessing this power and using it wisely to bring more of what we love into our lives, and of simultaneously being aware that our very ambivalence to our seductive nature can and does create the experience of what we don’t want to attract into our lives.
This begs us to look at our ambivalence. To see where we have deep desire to be more attractive and to get what we love in our life… and to see where we are terrified of going for what we truly would love and then allowing ourselves to really receive it fully.
We have natural power and with that power we must have wisdom.
We are meant to inspire action in the world, the kind of action we inspire is up to us individually.
Denying we are seductive places us in a precarious position, one where we still innately are magnetic, but one where we may suffer the consequences of the influence this primal force has on others.
Let’s look at it alchemically.
Inside of us is our magnetic womb-space, the birth-center of creation itself and the home of our sensual/sexual power.
This center is like water, it flows with sensuality and aliveness.
Inside of us there is also our heart-space, the center of our passion, enthusiasm, and profound self-respect.
This center is more like fire, it burns with exceptional brightness and has the capacity to burn through illusion and have us see the truth.
When we combine our water and fire elements, our sexuality with the consciousness of our heart center, in other words, our eros with our psyche, we birth steam, we birth pleasure, we birth conscious proceptivity.
In fact, what is intriguing about conscious sexual practice is invoking sexual hormones in combination with oxytocin. In other words, we create proceptivity on an on-going basis.
Women who do this literally glow like sweet, golden honey.
Our capacity to harness our natural seduction in combination with deep consciousness allows us to make peace with this powerful feminine force and to create experiences in the world that are both deliciously rewarding while being healthy and life-giving.
If learning how to do this for yourself is intriguing, I’d recommend starting with my book, The Emergence of The Sensual Woman.
I want to hear from you, is it true for you what I’ve shared? Do you desire to be more attractive and yet fear it? Do you love to flirt, yet dislike having to deal with the responses to your beauty? What other challenges do you face in being a magnetic being?