Every once in a while, the Media releases yet another ‘study’ that ‘proves’ that women do not have G-spots, causing this information to spread like wild-fire and creating a ripple-effect that has negative impact on a woman’s psycho-sexual well-being.
The article released by Mail Online titled “The Vaginal Orgasm Doesn’t Exist – It’s The Clitoris That Holds The Key To Female Pleasure” is one such article.
The title alone reveals that the author, and quite possibly the researchers, have limited understanding of the vastness of the pleasure system within a woman’s pelvis and body.
Evidently (and sadly) they are unaware that the pudendal nerve is accompanied by many other powerfully orgasmic nerves in our body such as our pelvic, vagus and hypogastric nerve pathways, just to name a few.
Not to mention the amazing erotic power of our own mind!
To say that the size of a woman’s clitoris determines her ability to achieve orgasm is like saying that the size of a man’s penis determines whether or not he can ejaculate
One of the failures of these types of studies, statements, and articles is that they focus almost entirely on the functional (and limited) model of sexuality with no mention of its counterpart, the meaning model of sexuality—which brings into light how powerfully interwoven our female desire is with the state of our mind and emotions.
Any grounded and well-versed sexologist knows that female desire and pleasure is a rich and complex world and not one that can be solved by a magic technique (although some techniques can definitely support a woman to explore and expand her pleasure).
Back in early 2008, I was completing my dissertation on looking at the effects of the Jade Egg on a woman’s psycho-sexual health, when a similar article was let loose into mainstream media.
I heard about it while teaching a live event when a woman waved a print out of the article and cried out, “I knew I didn’t have a g-spot! It says right here that scientists have now proven that not all women have one.”
I remember asking what they would say if an article came out stating that not all men have prostate glands. Most of them answered that it was ridiculous to say that, obviously feeling more confident about their knowledge on male sexual anatomy, than their own.
Upon deeper investigation of this article I found it was linked to a Doctor in Italy who specialized in male sexuality and had attempted his first female study.
The structure of the study was obviously incorrect from the get go, it was never peer-reviewed or approved, yet it was nonetheless released to the media.
What horrified me was noticing that such a bogus study could be quoted by mainstream media as the ultimate truth, without any regard for its impact on the millions of women who are influenced by it’s misleading assumptions.
To blatantly state that women worldwide do not experience vaginal orgasm and therefore proving the theory that the clitoris is the main source of pleasure for women is arrogant and dangerous.
It doesn’t take into consideration what most neurologists already know: each woman has a different erotic fingerprint. For some women it is obviously the clitoris, yet for others it’s the vagina, perineum or anus!
Furthermore, daily survival issues, abuse, and lack of sensual and sexual education as well as lack of leisure time to explore and relax into their own desires all contribute in the current state of women’s pleasure worldwide.
That said, it’s only in very recent times that we’ve come to recognize that we must include both the ‘how to’s’ and the ‘deeper meaning of sex’ in our description and understanding of female eros.
This broader viewpoint, which is inclusive of both our physical anatomy along with our state of being, has helped shift the definition of female sexuality from being one of purely birthing rights to being one where women are recognized as sexually intelligent beings.
The good news in all of this? Female pleasure and sexuality remains a constant source of fascination and mystery, and it is up to each one of us to return our attention to our own body—she doesn’t need any scientific validation of her unique pleasure abilities.
We cannot stop the media from blowing things out of proportion since these things traditionally attract a lot of attention.
However, we can make the choice to be discerning. To recognize pseudo-truths and weigh them against our own inner knowing: That we are literally unlimited in our pleasure potential.
If breaking free from restrictive and limiting beliefs and definitions about your pleasure and sexuality is something you are curious about, then my book the Emergence of the Sensual Woman – Awakening Our Erotic Innocence is a fantastic place to start.
Now it’s your turn! I want to hear how such articles impact you and how you go about trusting your own deep erotic wisdom. Leave me your thoughts below so we can continue the conversation.